Saturday, February 6, 2010

Update for all you guys who asked

Summer’s Over…Hurray for Fall << >> main

Hi, All.

Long time, no chat… It’s been a busy, weird fall and winter.

You can ignore all the adoption stuff that I wrote about last time. I guess my adopted mother lied through her teeth until the end. I will never know why, but I could never figure her out. Why would someone on their death bed STILL be so insecure? Maybe she knew the truth about my adoption? It’s a real strange story.

I spent $750 for Lutheran Social Services to find my birth mother and it was worth every penny. It may seem weird, but even at age 50, I still felt like a lost child. My main reason for starting this search was getting my health history, but I decided to spend the extra $350 to actually make contact with my birth mother and I’m so very glad I did.

Before I paid for the contact info, I had only paid for the health history search and the info that was given at the time of my adoption about my birth family. The two pages I got were interesting, but when I read those two pages to my birth mother, it turned out to be all lies. What REALLY happened was: My birth mother was 17, did not know who my father was, and she did NOT give permission for me to be given up. Apparently, her mother got together with LSS and gave all the info (lies) about my mother, father, and both families. Then, she signed all the adoption papers while my birthmother was unconscious and in surgery. When my birth mother woke up and went to find me in the nursery, I was gone. She never wanted to give me away and it has been a real burden for her for these last 50 years. I guess they could do that since my mother was a minor? Anyway, I am glad to have found her and am so sorry that her family did this to her.

My birth mother and I have a LOT in common. We could be sisters. We have the same beliefs: Everything from politics, religion, hobbies, likes and dislikes, etc. Definitely more nature in me than nurture. I’m so lucky to finally have an honest mother to talk to. I’m hoping to be able to get out to her side of the US soon. Between both of our health issues, it’s tough to schedule, but I’m going to get out there as soon as I can.

The health history isn’t all that good. There’s a lot of cancer. So, I’ve at least been given a heads-up about my greater chances of getting breast and/or colorectal cancer. The main reason wasn’t so much for me, but I have a son and 2 granddaughters, so this will be good for them, especially the colorectal cancer, since my mother first got it at age 42. She’s now 67 and is going through round 3 (I think) of this cancer so the Mayo Genetics department recommends that my son get his colon checked at age 32. Well, he’s almost 34, so that’s in the works. I had mine at the beginning of January, since I turned 50 anyway, and I’m clear.

Speaking of breasts, I’ve gotten 3 calls from my Mayo breast doc to get my left boob back down there and get it checked out. They got my past films and have found something new and different that they really say I need to get looked at. Well, that has to wait because I believe I am finally going to get the more provocative testing on my pituitary and hypothalamus that I have been trying to get done since last May. I’ll find out in a week when that will be scheduled and then make my boob appointment after that. Always something new on my health. I just wish there was something newer in my fiber world.

Speaking of GOOD stuff, my new granddaughter came a little early on December 3. Another perfect kid. I have managed to knit a row here and there these last 6 months and have almost got the body of a cardigan done for her. Thank goodness she’s small because I won’t finish it for a while yet. I’m using the Yarn Harlot’s “Daisy” pattern without the hood. I like it a lot. I knitted it mostly while visiting my step dad when he was asleep.

BabySweater01

Another GOOD/BAD thing was Xmas this year. In November, my stepdad was failing more and was in a LOT of pain so I talked to his doctor and got him Hospice care. I got a call Xmas Eve morning that he was getting worse, so I managed to drive the 30 miles through a nasty blizzard to get to the “home”, since for the last 3 years I’m all he’s had. Anyway, I got there about noon and rocked him and did my best to comfort him until he died at 4 am Xmas morning. Hospice had most of the “comfort drugs” there already, but they wanted him to get some Ativan for anxiety, too, so that didn’t get there until 8 pm instead of 2 pm, because it needed be brought by courier and the blizzard was still raging. The Ativan sure helped him a lot. He became lucid and frightened a lot, but between me and the drugs, he died as peacefully as possible. I am so thankful he is no longer suffering.

Since I can’t knit very much at all, I’m just “watching” the MMarioKKNits MMystery Knit-A-Long . This baby is beautiful. If they figure out what’s going on with me soon enough, I’m going to get into it ASAP. I’ve got both the yarn and beads ready to go, just need to get my hands back. I’ve always said that you can kill me, or take away all my mobility and most of my senses, but NOT my eyes or my hands. Well, I’m not dead, but my eyes and hands are not very good. Gotta get fixed soon. I have fields to plow, fences to build, gardens to plant, animals to get, looms to finish, fiber to spin, granddaughters to teach....

I guess this has been a mostly blather blog today, but for those of you would wanted an update, this is it. I HOPE the next one is me telling you that I’m back on track and there will be more pictures of cool fibery stuff.

1 comment:

Leigh said...

Wow, Tracy, what an amazing story about your birthmom! Congrats on your new grandbaby and I hope your own medical issues can be resolved with a minimum of stress!